I'm still me. Having returned to North Bay once again, likely until Christmas. It's cold here, cold like you wouldn't believe. It snowed this past weekend.

I don't know how much more I can handle. I'm not doing well academically right now. I'm tired, physically; I'm exhausted, emotionally. I don't know what to do with myself, period. I'm sick of being the person that I am, of being taken for granted, and taking others for granted in turn.

I have the Rufus Wainwright cover of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" in my mind and I think it's making me melancholy. As always, when push comes to shove, I can't express myself terribly well, at all, and nothing I've said thus far comes even close to describing how I feel right now. I don't know if I can make it through this year.

I'm scared of a lot of things right now, but most of all I'm afraid of myself.

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