I'm listening to old, sad music of my early teenage years. Stuff that, to quote Weezer, makes me sadly nostalgic for a time in my life that actually sucked. I don't know. Maybe it didn't suck as much as I sometimes think it did. I had some moments of happiness then, and though it proved to be as fleeting as it always is, I think I really did okay for myself when I was fifteen.

You know what would be really cool? If the world was like a courtroom, and you could say things to the jury and then withdraw them and instruct them to disregard your comments. I'd be all "Hey, irritating girl in my English class? Yeah, you're a bitch. Oops. I'd like to withdraw that. The jury will disregard." Basially you get the point across without actually having to commit to what you're saying.

Why is it 3 a.m.? How does that make any sense?

Monty came over again tonight. There was more X-box/Halo hijinks. Apparently he has a 61" TV that he'll be moving in soon. Bless capitalism.

I miss that stage of infatuation where the mere presence of that someone is a drug more exquisite than any you can buy, it's such a heady rush. The way you feel when you know there's a possibility your heart might get broken or at least bruised, but you're still drawn to that person like a moth to a flame. And if that flame burns you, you'll heal yourself and start over. I miss being in control of that feeling.

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