And so here I am, at the end of another long day, not really sure of what I want. To be all metaphorical about things that really don't bear much thinking about, I feel as though I am standing at the edge of a pool of water, one so calm and clear it's more perfect than glass, but so deep that I cannot see the bottom, and I can't decide whether or not to jump in or just gaze quietly at my reflection. If I jump in, I risk drowning, but at the same time, staying put means I run the risk of just 'settling' for something I can't quite put my finger on.
And after that unnecessarily lengthy and convoluted metaphor, back to our regular programming. I am bloody sick of how cold my house is. My mum bought all kinds of candles and they all have this 'clean laundry' scent. I kid you not. Personally, I do love the smell, it's just disconcerting to have your whole house smell of freshly laundered clothes.
I am going to the gym tomorrow. This should be interesting/scary. I have never been in anything that could be remotely considered 'shape' in my life. I am incredibly non-athletic, and often get winded walking up long flights of stairs. But it seems that some people think I should start exercising, so perhaps that is in order.
I'm feeling very frustrated with this journal right now. I"m having ahard time expressing my thoughts. This is confusion born of apathy. I need a new sense of purpose. With everything. There's got to be a light at the end of this tunnel--if this is indeed an actual tunnel.